Blog de Dyer

Fans of the long running Simpsons television series know all to well how downhill the show has gone in the last five or so years. Redemption is here in the form of a film that plays out like a newer episode regarding the lame story (wherein Springfield is isolated via a huge dome due to pollution contamination) but the humor will have you laughing like it’s Season 4. The humor itself seems to have really matured in some way to combat Family Guy, but still retains its class comedic values, from Homer’s stupidity to Springfield’s misfortune you should be busting a gut throughout all 90 minutes of this adventure about family values and pig excrement. The story really suffers since it plays out like an episode over 90 minutes instead of 22. It really drags out, but the amount of funny stuffed in between makes it something special. Lots of generic jokes, as well as some that are a little racy for The Simpsons grace the film, which clearly had high production values… The color is crisp and there’s an abundance of CG that blends in well with the rest of this movie that doesn’t make up for Groening’s abysmal decline in the last half-decade, but it puts a band-aid on the wound to help the bleeding stop… Then it kicks a coyote in to an icy pool of water to get you laughing.

Ratatouille is one of the most story/character driven stories that Pixar has ever delivered. With more adult humor and a slow pacing, I don’t think that this gorgeous story of a cook-to-be-rat would appeal to children. While it’s slow, and doesn’t go anywhere very fast, it’s a very wholesome story between the rat, his “owner” who tries to cook in a four-star restaurant that satisfies in the end. It’s not as good as many of the other Pixar flicks in the sense that it’s not as outright-stupid-funny, but it pushes a lot of laughs out of you as you remain interested throughout the entirety, despite the incredibly slow pacing. Memorable characters, from an evil food critic, maniacal chef, and a clan of hilarious rats have you paying attention to every detail of the story and the amazing character models. It’s a great movie for the patient, since again, this goes nowhere fast, and for about the first half of the film. Children will likely like it for the reasons children would, but be bored to tears with the story and pacing.

8/10

Koei is a company revered, well or otherwise, for its Dynasty Warriors games. Showcasing ancient China in a war-torn era and famous Chinese generals, Dynasty Warriors has been milking its own gameplay style for years with a formula that, while it works, has been completely dried out over repetition and lack of new/interesting mechanics. Come this autumn Koei looks to change all of that by integrating not Chinese war-mongers, but gigantic friggin’ robots; a demo for the mish-mash is available on the Playstation Network for those interested enough to try it out.

When you load up the game you’ll immediately recognize the map screen, if you’re a Dynasty Warriors fan that is. What you’ll find different is that now you have the option to listen to horrid English dubs of Japanese dialog as opposed to poor dubs of Chinese dialog. As Heero Yuy you will pilot a “Mobile Suit” (see also: giant god damn robot) loaded with a big ol’ laser sword for melee attacks and a giant rifle for long range robot smashing. Utilizing these weapons in various combos results in different attacks for different radius’ which build up your ‘musou’ (see also: giant god damn robot’s special attack) meter to deal with groups of enemies. Too bad you don’t ever really need it. You’ll progress through the linear levels that Dynasty fans are all too familiar with not only in look or feel but in environmental structure - it’s like Koei took their old levels and dumped them in to this for robots instead of Asians to romp around in. Wailing on baddies is as simple as a repetitious “Square, Square, Square” combination button press that can be mixed up every so often with a “Triangle” for some stronger attacking. Quite literally, there is no reason to jump, dash, fly or use your musou attacks because your melee attack not only kills the mindless enemies in one hit, but you need not fear of being attacked. Ever. No one will attack you unless they’re a boss so playing this is dull. It’s like bowling with a giant ball against pins that run directly in to it on purpose. While the fighting looks cool and slicing 30 robots in half at a time is a good time it just doesn’t offer enough variety. There seems to be a leveling up element and collecting of parts that the demo didn’t seem to let you tinker with, if you can at all. Customization is limited to null as far as I can tell and one play through was enough to let me know that while this game is fun, it is simply Dynasty Warriors and nothing more.

It shouldn’t be surprising really, since this game blatantly has Dynasty Warriors in the title. Adding a robot chump in place of Lu Bu just won’t cut it for originality and depth. The game nails the feel of the anime it’s based on and the characters are pseudo-cel shaded so they represent their cartoon avatar more appropriately but it’s not enough to make anyone go ga-ga over. While fans of either series should at least check out the demo, since it is fun, it just can’t warrant sixty of my hard earned dollars when it comes out this fall.